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YOU KNOW WHY YOUR GENERATION SUCKS?
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Published: February 8, 2025
Author: Daniel Conderman
Context: Recovered Conderman.Group economic and generational commentary
Original URL: https://conderman.group/2025/02/you-know-why-your-generation-sucks/


Oh, sit down and let me spell it out for you. Back in my day, people had
something called aspiration -- it was a real thing! You wanted a house? You
busted your ass, saved up, and got a mortgage. Maybe you had to worry about
some psycho lurking in your hedge maze like it was a yuppie-nightmare horror
flick, but at least you had a hedge maze. These days, the closest thing to
home ownership most people get is customizing their Animal Crossing island
or praying their landlord does not make another "market adjustment."

Owning a house used to be the norm. Now it is a pipe dream wrapped in a
lottery ticket, deep-fried in student debt, and served with a side of 25%
APR. Can't afford a home? Become an influencer. Start a podcast. Sell your
soul for brand deals and pray to the algorithm gods that you are not
shadowbanned before you can afford groceries. Or dump your last $20 into
digital loot boxes, because who needs savings when you might score a
legendary skin for a pixelated anime sword?

Gambling is no longer a vice; it is an economic survival strategy. Can't pay
rent? Try crypto, stocks, or the "Will my DoorDash side hustle cover rent?"
roulette wheel. Buy another NFT of a cartoon monkey smoking a cigar. Maybe an
Elon tweet will bless you with tendies and a down payment.

The real horror genre now is the eternal roommate era. You are not worried
about losing the American Dream; you were never invited to the party. We had
movies where suburbanites feared psycho killers. You have TikToks of people
discovering that their Craigslist landlord has been living in the walls. You
are not terrorized in your McMansion; you split a 500-square-foot studio with
three strangers and a pet snake named "security deposit."

Before you say boomers ruined the economy: I get it. The system is rigged.
But you do not have to double down on the grift. If we stopped tossing cash
into microtransactions, gacha pulls, and mystery boxes containing nothing but
regret, perhaps we would have some capital again. What if we put money into
something that exists in the real world? Maybe homeownership could become a
thing again instead of a mythological relic beside pensions and job security.

That is the true horror: yuppie nightmares cannot exist because there is
nothing left to lose. There is no house, no equity, no good job with benefits
-- only the grind, the hustle, and the hope that the next gig, post, or
jackpot will be the one that saves you.

If that is the world you have to live in, at least buy some land before the
metaverse sells it back to you in installments.
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